DYNAMIC YOUTH online Magazine - Editor's Letter for August 2014
Avoid Vain Arguments
From the Editor
Dear
Youth of the World,
Man
is a social animal. We value relationships for exchange of ideas and mutual
evaluation. We share our experiences with one another that turn out to be
beneficial to all.
Even
from childhood we long for recognition. For children, the positive strokes they
receive from others make them happy and self-confident. This helps them grow as
strong adults and enables them to move with the external world fearlessly.
Those
who suffer from inferiority complex usually avoid mixing with others and their
communication is limited to grunts and groans. But a person who has clarity of
mind has unambiguous views on all the subjects related to him; and others also
would greatly benefit by discussing with him. When there is disagreement on any
issue, discussions help us thrash it out from all the points of view and arrive
at the most sensible solution for it.
It
is important that discussions, whether it is between two persons or among the
members of a group, should take place in a healthy atmosphere. All the
participants should aim at finding the right answers without any bias or
prejudice. They should be open-minded and should be willing to share their
knowledge with others and also to benefit by the views of others.
If
there is ego problem the objectivity in discussion will be totally lost.
Similarly, if a participant is particular that only his views should be
accepted by all others, the quality of the decision taken will greatly suffer.
The presence of a sensible group leader or moderator would be useful in such
cases.
We
should always be particular in providing a system for open discussion in all
organizations including family. Any simple difference of opinion can develop
into serious quarrels in the absence of chances for frank discussion.
While
a discussion is intended for exchange of ideas and enhance the general level of
understanding of a subject, we should take care about maintaining its standard.
If any of the participants in a discussion is not sincere in his approach, if
he has some vested interests, if he is obsessed with fear, anger, hatred or any
other negative feeling, his mind would not allow him to be dispassionate and
balanced. His thoughts would not be well-organized and so he cannot also
appreciate the genuineness of the views of others. He would go on repeating
what he believes, overlooking the arguments of others, however sound they may
be. In such cases, even a well-intentioned discussion would become a heated
argument and may also lead to a quarrel.
We
should be watchful about the attitude, and manner of presentation of the other
person and if we find him obsessed with a wrong point of view, we should avoid
further discussion with him, lest it should become a quarrel even if we are not
for it. Their friendship is not good.
Thiruvalluvar
says: We cannot introduce clarity by our words to those whose minds are
disorganized, unstructured, and unreceptive. (Thirukkural 825)
மனத்தின் அமையா தவரை எனைத்தொன்றும் சொல்லினால் தேறற்பாற்று அன்று. (manaththin amaiyAthavarai
enaiththondRum chollinAl thERaRpaRRu andRu.)
Mark
Twain said in his own inimitable manner, "Never argue with a fool,
onlookers may not be able to tell the difference."
Wishing you all the best,
(T Joseph Benziger)
26 July 2014
